Chapter 27

Life wasn't exactly easy at Shaymin House after that. Passing one test for Lady Gracidea only meant raising the standards for the next one. By the next day, she was right back to her usual schedule of education, right beside Eleanor. 

Mrs. Boylston was far less lenient with her since her transformation, subjecting her to exhausting training in every craft a noble lady needed. She spent endless hours learning how to walk, or do her hair, or assemble a properly dignified outfit.

When she wasn't doing stupid things, there was just as much conventional education for her to learn. At least she had a reason to pay attention during the mathematics portion of her classes now. Ilene's instruction made it quite clear that mastering her psychic powers would require learning other things about how the world really worked. 

It also helped that Eleanor didn't feel quite as much like an adversary anymore. Now they both knew the future Lady Gracidea had chosen for her, Eleanor's fear of a rival for inheritance were put to rest. Mrs. Boylston could only teach so much with her high standards and biting criticism. More often, it was having Eleanor to copy that helped Hayden learn.

She never did get around to writing to her family about what happened to her. Maybe that meant Holland got to tell them, or maybe they just didn't know. The pain was still too fresh for Hayden to deal with.

As the weeks passed, it wasn't Hayden who ran out of steam. One day the ditto wasn't there for her morning classes. Mrs. Boylston said nothing about her absence, just chided Hayden that a proper lady should not ask such questions and returned her to her studies. Another week passed, and she was completely on her own.

But when she went to find Eleanor to ask her about it, she always found her room empty. She'd been there, her scent was fresh—but the ditto was nowhere to be seen. She even showed up late at night, trying to catch the ditto before bed. But each and every time, she was already asleep.

It took her almost another week to figure out exactly where her sister was going. Eventually she caught Christel, who was friendly enough with Hayden that she would answer her questions.

"She's in the shrine," Christel explained. "Ever since the lady stopped forcing her to attend her morning instruction. She stays until she's bleeding from it, then someone carries her back."

And you didn't tell me?

Of course, it was the one place she could hide from Hayden as long as she liked—Hayden didn't go to the shrine anymore, not after her last memory there. Lady Gracidea didn't care if she went or not—she was already a girl.

But now she would have to go. As soon as the day's lessons were over, she hurried straight there. She still had to catch herself before she went into the guys' locker room. She changed into one of the new shrine outfits, feeling more self-conscious as she changed than she had since meeting Camael. 

If it was just for herself, Hayden would've turned right back around. But as confrontational as Eleanor had been, she was probably the reason Hayden had survived her first two months in Shaymin House. She had to do something to look out for her.

In the late afternoon the shrine was busy. A half-dozen little groups gathered under the dome. Several were soldiers, others servants. Only one had a single person, meditating in silence on the upper, unreachable platform. A shaymin paced around the edges. Loch looked lean and strong in sky forme, overflowing with power the land forme just couldn't match. 

Hayden resisted the urge to copy him. That was an instinct she had to fight more and more since the tutor had increased the intensity of her lessons. A proper lady was herself in her own house. Somehow, she always found out if Hayden had changed into anything else with witnesses around.

She didn't change now but skipped up into the air. She dodged the other, cutting directly across the room to the platform where Loch and Eleanor practiced. The familiar zen garden was still here, strange circles in a bed of fine sand broken with crystals. The patterns looked different than Hayden remembered, but the effect was the same. Here was a place for quiet contemplation, of introspection and mental mastery.

Here was the place for demigods to descend from the sky and torture little kids until they burned alive.

By the time she arrived, Loch was already sitting in Eleanor's lap, frozen in meditation. He pretended not to see them, as though he hadn't been walking around moments before. As a shaymin, he would sense them there, the same way Hayden could feel nearby sources of power. Granted, she wasn't that impressive yet. But while not hiding…

She settled down opposite her adoptive sister and took the same stance. Or she tried. This was a very complex discipline, with legs folded in ways that hurt her joints just to think about. She tried her best.

"You look different," she eventually said, when she was brave enough to interrupt. "The flower is new. I like it." There was much more than just a flower. Eleanor was a full head taller than she was. She looked older, her chest was fuller, her skin was softer. Everything about her was just more… pokémon. More shaymin, in this case.

"I would." Eleanor's voice was cold, sharp. She didn't move from her meditation. But with each breath, Hayden felt the strain, even if she didn't say it.

This was what Ilene had been searching for in her. Loch's chest didn't just rise and fall as he inhaled, but he shook, like faint ripples passing through him. She's trying to stay a shaymin for longer. 

She felt bad interrupting her. Obviously, she had been changed a long time. Since that morning, when she didn't come to breakfast or her classes. 

"She must be exhausted," Liz thought. "Can you feel it?"

She nodded. "Do we know any healing moves?"

"Haven't learned those yet. Sylveon can. Or Chansey. We could use one of those."

There was no way to help the struggling ditto. Anything Hayden said would probably break her concentration and take away from her practice. But she hadn't come just to watch. 

"I miss you," she said.

"My mother doesn't require me to go to instruction anymore," she said. "Sh-she… she told me… the requirement only extended to noble ladies. She doesn't expect me to perform it."

There were so many layers beneath those simple words, depths that Hayden the eevee never could've figured out. Hayden the mew could read the implications a bit better. To tell her she didn't need to come to class was as good as telling her she didn't need her to be a noble lady anymore.

"I thought you were an only child," Hayden whispered. Even alone on the suspended island, she didn't want anything she said to be overheard.

Eleanor laughed. She looked up, adjusted her sitting position until she was kneeling on the sand instead. "There have been a lot of shaymin over the years. I assume one of my older brothers or sisters must've changed their minds about inheriting." 

She closed her eyes, speaking slowly. "When I was young, they used to tell me how important this was. I'd be their chance to offer the family torch to a new generation. All the Great Families are very old, they want to join the ancestors. I was such a failure, that won't be possible. Now someone a century older than me will probably take over instead. 

"Probably Amir. He's always had plans for Sinnoh, but we weren't big enough to be worth it to him. But now that you're here, we might not be a waning house anymore. We'll be rich and prosperous again. He can make the region he always imagined. I'm no longer needed."

Had Hayden ever seen her cry before? But Eleanor was crying now, tears that stained her cheeks faintly purple as they slid down.

There was only one thing for her to do. Hayden wrapped her arm around her, and squeezed as tight as she could. So tight that the girl beneath her deformed in her grip, as though her bones were made of jelly.

When Hayden let go, she contracted, her dress suddenly loose on a much less mature, smaller body. Hayden didn't move away from her, though she did fill with curiosity at what she saw. 

Eleanor looked different as herself, too. Her hair wasn't just slightly damp-looking purple anymore, but looked more like thick purple strands smeared on her head, slowly melting in and out of each other.

"Woah," Hayden whispered. "You're—"

"Disgusting," Eleanor said, turning her back on Hayden. "I don't have to be psychic to see what people are thinking. We knew it would happen, but we don't care. If all we'll ever be is a ditto, then that's what we'll be. The best ditto there ever was."

Hayden took her hand again. Eleanor tried to pull away, and her arm stretched, rather than slipping out of her grip. It wasn't just her imagination—like there weren't bones underneath anymore. Hayden didn't let go.

"I don't think you're disgusting. It's… kinda neat, what you've been able to do. You got this far without an Awakened Master to burn you. That's incredible."

"Shock you," she corrected. "It was Camael, zapdos. He doesn't have fire."

She shrugged, settling down beside Eleanor. This time she didn't try to get away. Maybe she knew that she'd never be able to, not with Hayden's mythical strength. Compared to the other people in her life, Hayden was the weakest by far. But Eleanor was a ditto, not a mythical pokémon.

"I lost my family too," she whispered. "And my body. I know what it's like."

Eleanor sniffed. She cried again, leaning against Hayden. Her tears were purple, not made of water anymore. Hayden didn't move. Liz did, floating over to Loch and nuzzling him with the same comforting affection Evelynn's daemon treated her with when they were upset. She wasn't disgusted by the half-melted ditto either.

"I want to hate you… so bad, Hayden. I feel like I've earned it. You messed everything up."

Hayden waited for her to move away, or maybe transform again. She didn't. But if she'd been transformed all day, straining her endurance in this meditation, maybe she didn't have the strength.

"If it makes you feel better," Hayden whispered. "Liz and I, we'll… understand. Sometimes it's good to have someone you're fighting. Back in Sunyshore, there was this rivalry between the townies and the sailor kids. Townies had things a little better, most of the time. Our families lived there full time, put down roots. But the sailors' kids had better territory. Tourists came through, and the piers were more fun for climbing. So, we fought."

"You?" Eleanor looked up, choking back tears. She wiped at her face with one arm. As she did, her features stretched too, briefly distorting before moving back into place. Maybe it should've disgusted Hayden—but it just looked like a ditto to her. "I can't imagine you fighting."

Hayden puffed out her chest, indignant. "Oh, I fought. Liz and I were fierce. We didn't want to settle like everyone else, and we used it."

Liz bobbed into the air in front of them. "You remember how easy it was to change before. Our older brother taught us about types and advantages, so we learned the best ways to fight every kid on the other side. It didn't matter if we were smaller."

"I didn't really hate them… except Corrin. He tried to take my sister's medicine away. But everyone else, fighting was just what we did. Sometimes our daemons won, and we took a little territory. Sometimes we lost and we had to retreat. But if we got a few pokéyen, they always let us come out onto the pier to buy an ice cream. We didn't have to fight all the time."

Eleanor looked away from her, over the edge of the suspended platform. They watched as servants and soldiers emptied from the shrine, for the start of their late afternoon shift.

"But I think we're better off if you find someone else to hate," Hayden continued, once she was brave enough. "We should be on the same side. We have too much in common to be fighting. We should be helping each other instead."

Eleanor choked back a laugh. A little of her usual bitterness returned. She still didn't pull away. "What could we possibly have in common, Hayden? Two people couldn't be more different. You're everything I'm supposed to be. I spent my whole life being trained to settle as a shaymin—you settled naturally. You won over the steward of Mew House. My mother doesn't even want to keep training me anymore. You're going to marry into more wealth and power than any shaymin has ever had."

Hayden shoved up against Eleanor with one hand, annoyed. "We didn't want to be trapped as one thing, so we wouldn't give it up even though it meant ruining things. I had to leave my family behind, yours feels like they're leaving you."

Hayden looked down at Liz, meeting her eyes. Were they brave enough to try this? The daemon knew what she was thinking, or maybe it had come from her to begin with. She nodded. Together, they changed.

Hayden had to imagine what she would be like as a ditto. Taller, stretched and lean the way Eleanor was. As a ditto, she'd be the kind of person who wanted to change above everything else—a version of Hayden who would explore every new place she saw and try to fit in there before moving on. 

Her hair melted to her head, much shorter than it had been seconds before. Her eyes turned purple. When she spoke, her voice was a little deeper and less musical, as though whatever was under her skin was more the suggestion of organs than the real thing. 

"Who else could keep up with you, Eleanor? Who else are you going to train with, or get in trouble with? The servants' kids are too scared to spend time with me. Bet it's the same with you."

"Nah." Eleanor looked up. She wasn't crying anymore. "I never bothered trying when I was younger. But after I settled, it was easier. Just have to look like you belong is all. Little obedient daemons are the best. Even if they know who you are, your daemon is how they judge what kind of person you are."

"This is how you feel all the time?" Liz asked, moving slowly along the sand towards Hayden. "It's so… relaxing. I didn't know staying solid took so much effort."

Loch giggled, watching her. Despite her best efforts, Liz wasn't traveling very quickly. Instead of moving, she mostly just melted and reformed, digging a deeper hole in the sand without making forward progress. "Try to find something nice and smooth to sleep in. Glass feels really nice, especially if you put it near the window so it gets cooler as the night goes on."

They would have to try it now that it was into Liz's head. "Can't we stay friends, Eleanor? Even if you don't want to do class anymore—I wouldn't either, Mrs. Boylston is awful. But I still want to spend time with you. There's no one else in the whole world who can understand what it's like—but you do."

Eleanor hugged her back. Hayden didn't squish as much as she did—her sister's arms stretched and extended past her, like water breaking against a stubborn stone. But the intent was there. Just as when she'd copied Liz, being near another ditto filled her with a little of the same comfort. She wasn't alone.

"I don't hate you. I wanted to—but I can't. No matter how hard I try. I swear it's your daemon brainwashing me."

Hayden rested comfortably against her chest, feeling peace for the first time since she'd been with Cody. It was her turn to cry. "I've never had to be alone before," she whispered. "I always had my big sister to take care of me. I guess maybe I started seeing you like Evelynn. Always there, even when you were hard on me. I missed you."

"Baby." Eleanor let go. "I haven't been avoiding you that long. You could've made new friends."

"I didn't want to."